Cupcake

Maz, Ray, Tom 

Report by Maz

Whenever I had spoken to people about Cupcake, the response was either “haven’t done it” or “it’s a bit muddy down there.”

With such an enticing sounding name, surely a bit muddy, meant, well, a bit muddy. Research had garnered that the eponymous Cupcake is a rather cakey looking calcite feature somewhat near to the entrance. Sounded lovely.

Ray hadn’t managed to get many takers for this and had floated alternatives. I, however, was keen to see this fine piece of geological patisserie. Tom kindly offered to show us the way.

According to the description, Cupcake is a series of pitches connected by various highly decorated crawls, rifts, ducks and passages, eventually joining up with Notts 2 at the superbly named Count Lazio Stroganoff’s Aven. Our plan was to give some of it a go.

Our descent began when Tom was tempted by the entrance in situ rope. A few feet down and the shout up was this was a quick one. I’m not keen on those sort of ropes, so Ray was persuaded to rig one especially for me. Quickly down, through a shored section, and we were on to one of several crawls. This culminated in the famous Cupcake feature. I do like these looky likey type formations and while I appreciate some resemble their name only vaguely, cupcake does very much look like a cupcake.

Mission accomplished, it was time to explore. Tom had been down to just beyond pitch 3 before and was keen to further his knowledge of the cave. Some more crawling, this time with added mud, we descended via Splashdown pitch into Pool chamber. That’s where the proper mud began. Not so much of a splash, rather a gooey splat. The journey though was made better with some excellent formations including wonderful translucent straws. A tight downward rift then led to some nice traversing. Tom leading down the unpleasant slope that was mud pitch. There was no avoiding the horribleness here and soon we were caked.

This point marked Tom’s furthest exploration. To move on, we needed to escape the chamber. We knew there was a tight rift climb at the far end. If we could get someone up onto the ledge above, they could rig a rope down for the rest of us. Brilliant! We soon spotted a scaffolding pole 30 or so feet above. That was the way forward.

What followed was a genuinely impressive free climb by Ray up a tall, vertical, extremely tight, exposed, muddy rift. Upon gaining the ledge, Ray informed us that the scaffold pole we were relying on, was in fact just tape. He did find the bolt however, and rigged the pitch. This was Limbo Pitch

I ascended first and did OK for a while. At the top, the pitch narrowed and my progress slowed. Soon I was down to short movements, gradually inching up, using, elbows, knees even my head, to aid my progress. I arrived exhausted. By the time Tom’s head popped up, I was just getting my breath back and heart rate under control.

We were keen to continue. Some hugely impressive formations followed and along rifts and easy traverses. Sludge Crawl lived up to its name. tight, squeezy and muddy. Very, very muddy. Ray dumped his SRT kit and Tom left the tackle sack. We carried on through this hell hole to pitch 5; Slither Aven.

Although the way forward looked perfectly fine, this became our terminus as time was getting on and I was aware that was becoming knackered.

Back through sludge crawl. I regretted leaving my knee pads in the van. Formations gazed at on the way in became a blur as we soon reached the descent down Limbo pitch. Gravity and a very muddy rope soon had me on the bottom of the pitch. Ray downclimbed the rift to meet us. I don’t know how he got on with it, as I was already on the mud slope. Progress on this return journey seemed very quick until a squeeze literally stopped me. On the way in I’d just wriggled through. After a bit of effort, I was free, Tom and Ray offering encouragement.

We breezed past the Cupcake and soon we were out to a setting sun. Our clothes, rope and SRT kit covered in mud.

Would I do it again? Probably. Was it worth the mud and crawls? Back at home 24 hours later, I’d say yes. Would I recommend it? Like many things in life, you just have to see it for yourself.

The moral of the story? Don’t judge a book by it’s cover, don’t judge a cave by it’s name. Cupcake, my arse. Mississippi Mud Pie more like. Thanks to Ray and Tom for rigging.